WWII Tank Stirs Up Trouble in River Oaks, Texas

Sherman Tank texas attorney
Source: Wikimedia Commons

We’ve always known Texans were a little different than people in any of the other 49 states. They’re weirdly fixated on the size and shape of their state. And they run around in cowboy hats and leather boots. They park WWII tanks outside their houses.

Wait, what?

Meet Tony Buzbee: attorney, history buff, and quintessential Texan. While overseas, he spent $600,000 on a fully functional green army tank used in the second world war. The tank in question apparently landed at Normandy before helping to liberate Paris. It finally ended up in Berlin.

Admittedly, that’s pretty cool. And if you have $600,000 lying around, why not spend it on a tank?

One reason: your neighbors.

Buzbee can obviously afford to dish out thousands of dollars on a tank, because he lives in a very nice part of Texas (River Oaks), in a multi-million dollar home. A home which now has a ginormous tank parked out front.

His neighbors say the WWII tank obstructs traffic and is a safety hazard. But let’s be honest: they’re just jealous.

And since Buzbee is an attorney, he knows (or so he says, anyway) that the homeowners association can’t actually force him to move the tank, as it’s not violating any rules. However, in a good move for friendlier neighborhood relations, Buzbee has said he plans to move the WWII tank to his east Texas ranch.

So what’s Buzbee planning to do with the tank once it’s been safely relocated to East Texas? I’ve got some ideas. For one thing, he could loan it out for parades and make some money. Or let his kids drive it to the DMV to take their driver’s license test: I can only see this happening in Texas, but I actually really can see it happening in Texas. Or maybe – I don’t know much about the interior structure of a tank – but how cool would it be if you set up a mini movie theatre inside and watched movies about World War II inside your WWII tank?

What I wouldn’t give to have $600,000 to blow on a tank.